by Larry Buhl
Every city has a gay epicenter: Market and 18th in San Francisco, Halsted and Roscoe in Chicago. In Akron, Ohio, where I grew up, it was probably near the rack of parachute pants in the Chess King store at Belden Village Mall.
In Los Angeles, at least at 9 o’clock on weekend mornings, it’s the Starbucks at Santa Monica and Westmount Drive. I’ve been going here at least two days a week since around 1998. The baristas know me by my order. “Short drip?” they chirp before I approach the counter. Short coffee, I want to correct them.
You could say all Starbucks are the same: the same smell of burnt beans, ostentatious drinks whose names require practicing, racks of mugs nobody buys, Norah Jones. But more than 90 percent of the customers at my Starbucks are gay – more regular-guy-and-his-dog gay than six-pack abs gay – and they’ve made it into a genuine social center, even more so than a bar. I’m among that 90 percent, but I don’t socialize there. For me, it’s a place for cheap(ish) adequate coffee and bland music that won’t distract me from The New York Times, inviting but not comfortable enough to stay longer than it takes to read the Arts section and the editorials. If I time it right, I can score an already-read Times from the discard bin at the front door.
I could brew my own coffee, but making a whole pot is wasteful. I prefer to get out of the house first thing, and Starbucks is the perfect distance for a morning walk. The Coffee Bean is several more blocks away, with only five tables, louder music, and no Times. The smaller Starbucks next to the Coffee Bean has even less seating, so there’s no point. I could drive to an independent coffeehouse, but I hate driving, and indies are too homey. They almost shout, “What’s your rush? Play Scrabble.” And call me crazy, but I like being known by my drink order rather than “Larry.” Maybe I’ve lived in a big city too long.
They remodeled the gay Starbucks last year and they doubled the seating area. But as with freeways that become clogged a week after they’re widened, almost every seat is usually occupied. There’s a communal bench where you’re almost forced to chat up whoever is across from you. I don’t have the time to do that. Like I said, I’m there for coffee and the Times.
The place has shifting moods. Afternoons mean writing partners enthusiastically hammering out story lines (“The hooker is also a hedge fund manager!”). Evenings bring awkward first dates with guys who met online with high hopes. Late evenings are filled with the more somber whisper clicking of scripts being created on laptops (FADE IN: A stiletto-heeled hooker, with the steely resolve of a hedge fund manager). I rarely visit during those times.
On weekend mornings, though, everyone seems to know each other and is interested in getting to know everyone else. Even the occasional family who’s just checked out of the pink Ramada next door, carrying suitcases and scolding their children in German accents, will chat up a group of guys.
The place has been, for me, the perfect place to be among people, yet anonymous. But lately I’ve begun feeling like a short drip hermit.
I blame my mother. Twice in the last month she has told me how she can’t wait to come back to visit Los Angeles so she can go to “that nice Starbucks” and meet some more of those “nice gay men.” I assume she is willing to spend upwards of $450 on a plane ticket to see me as well, but she hasn’t said that in so many words. With every visit she eschews the usual tourist attractions. For her, the gay Starbucks is Los Angeles, and she acts like it’s her own AARP cotillion. In 20 minutes she will talk to more people there than I have since the Clinton presidency–this from a woman who usually views strangers with fear and a little loathing and carries her purse in a plastic CVS bag to deter muggers.
“You could be friendlier,” she said after the last time I took her there. I was indoors reading the Times Book Review while she was on the patio discussing dog training with a guy who had two Chihuahuas. It’s not a matter of being friendly, I try to tell her. I socialize, just not there. It’s hard to explain that I actually go to a Starbucks for the coffee.
She has no interest in going to a Starbucks in Akron. The weather is lousy, so no patios. Presumably gay men there brew their own. If she doesn’t make it out here this year, I might just send her a few Norah Jones CDs.
Larry Buhl is a Los Angeles-based freelance reporter and writer who covers medicine, technology, entertainment and politics.
*Photo by Larry Buhl.


Larry, does your mom even have a cd player? Mine doesn’t. Probably even better for her than Norah Jones cd’s would be one of those mugs that nobody buys…and then you can claim a first!
Nice article but what smaller Starbucks are you talking about that is next to the Coffee Bean? If you’re talking about the one near Pavillions it’s about 5 blocks away…hardly next door.
thanks for the morning humor. a lot of recognizable observations. that last part about your mother was a cream of a conclusion. I go to the local bookstore to read. it feels better sometimes to be around people and yet not feel obligated to strike up conversation (as opposed to being a hermit at home).
It’s too bad that Starbucks isn’t socially conscious regarding other issues…they still continue to allow “open carry” in their stores…so the next time you see someone walk into a Starbucks with a gun you might want to remind them that they can refuse to allow “open carry” in the same way a restaurant can refuse to allow folks without shoes or shirts. We have asked them to join with other responsible stores, CPK, Peets etc who have been more responsible and refused to allow open carry in their stores, but Starbucks has continued to resist.
Great story about the center of a neighborhood; but hardly the center of the city.
A delightful read!
Great yarn.
Reminds me of my trip back home to Memphis when my Mom is introducing me as “my son from California” as such a badge of honor for traveling to the left coast- bohemian adventureland. Introduced to the gas station cashier, dry cleaners manager. When I ask how long she has been such good friends with them, she replies she has never met them before.
Somehow, Moms socializing with a mission must be genetic.
Great read – and yeah, so true – that Starbucks sure is the “Gay Epicenter” of WeHo… Was just there yesterday afternoon in-between meetings, and kind-of felt awkward being the only one with Suit and Tie…
What I found most amusing was the row of extension cords laying on the floor to tap that PRECIOUS resource for our laptops, even if you’re sitting at one of the high-tables in the middle of the Cafe… (and yeah, there were more than a dozen laptops humming away with their owners clicking furiously on the keyboard writing their stories… )
A piece of WeHo culture, that’s for sure!
Another interesting anqle to Starbucks is its function as a hiring center for gay kids in the inner city in SoCal. From my experience, Starbucks in inglewood, compton, bell, florence, south gate, bell gardens, seem to hire gay kids, and other misfits in their social groups — very overweight kids, kids who are neither skaters or gang members or jocks. it’s an important outlet for kids who don’t fit in elsewhere, it’s always seemed to me.